Thailand: Chaing Mai- it’s not all Flowers and Sunshine

Local Birthday party mode in Chaing Mai, definitely a positive experience.

Hello Meanderthal’s, sometimes life isn’t all instagramable moments, earth shattering scenery or living the exotic dream. Sadly, I think social media is *operant conditioning” us to believe such things and the poor old Pavlov would roll over in his grave and shake his head at what we have become.  Even in the idyllic Thailand, there is what I call the grind and this week I experienced it in its full ferocity. But frustrating as it was you simply must go with the flow.

In order to prove my point, I’ll just point out a few examples of a regular week in Thailand when not on tour. Mind you I still had fun and it is after all an experience.  First up was a visit to Immigration and that nearly did my head in. As part of my “retirement” visa process had to change my Thai Tourist visa to a non-immigrant O visa before I could apply for the 12 month retirement visa. Seems logical enough.  Ok here’s the tricky part. Both visas have different requirements. The retirement visa has a money in a local bank clause. I get that. So off I go to the bank beforehand to get a letter which costs me 100baht (4.35AUD) to verify funds in the bank. I also have to have my old school passport bank book updated on the day that I apply. Don’t ask me why I couldn’t show an electronic version it’s just not possible. I’m warned about this, so I try to get my bank book updated at 5am via an ATM before I line up in Immigration at 0715hrs for a 0800hrs start because of the massive queues. Anyway, no joy at the ATM, my bank book isn’t working for some unknown reason. But all is not lost, my visa lady thinks it’ll be ok as I have a same day ATM receipt.

GG broke her tail bone, apparently the number plate was too heavy for the tidy tail, causing fatigue fractures. See it’s not all peaches and cream in the life of a meanderthal. Despite it being a “grind “moment it was still a rewarding experience

Arriving at Immigration … Step 1 of 5. line up and you get a ticket, you wait…. We were 13th in line (unlucky fucking 13, just great) 30 min later we’re called up. Visa lady hands documents to document checker lady. Document lady notes passport book was updated yesterday and points this out. A barrage of questions in Thai fly between the two and it’s finally decided that it’s worth a shot. Step 2. We’re in the front door of Immigration now and another queue. We’re called up after 30min wait, 2nd official notes passbook is updated from yesterday and no amount of convincing will let us proceed without updated document. However, all is not lost, Official keeps us in the queue for step 3 but we have to dash off to the bank for passbook update. 20 min later I’m back in the queue and waiting. Step 3, official calls me up after about 45min and here is where it gets interesting, we pass briefly and are told to sit down and wait for photo and payment of visa. Five minutes later I’m called up…. All is not well, the updated passbook balance done 30min ago is below the balance of the bank letter done yesterday and they have to match. By this time, I’m pointing at a full bank statement that I just paid 400 baht for and nope you guessed it. Not good enough…. So it’s off to the bank again for a bank letter to match the updated passbook balance. It absolutely makes no sense and I’m dirty at 2nd official cause she didn’t pick this up and it would have saved a trip to the bank. 30 minutes later I’m back in the queue, I wait another 45 minutes, pay my money for the visa and promptly receive a temporary visa for 3 weeks. It seems I have to go back, wait in line again and get a stamp in the passport and then I’m good for 3 months. However, after that I have to go back yet again in 2 months, prove I still have coin in the bank with both documents and wait in queue again for up to 5 hours for my visa.  Such is the way of the Immigration system. Needless to say, I learned some valuable lessons …. boxes will be ticked and a packed lunch with water and a laptop on full charge will be accompanying me.

Not sure about eating this crab, turns out it is edible but the locals just use it for flavour in a dish and to feed to the odd gullible farangs.

Ok next day, I’m getting the grey ghost seat fixed (my boot ripped it twice) and my friend tells me that my number plate is falling off. I check and sure enough the tidy tail support bracket has let go. Thinking it’s a warranty job we drive to the other side of town to get a new bracket. The after parts man tells me that a new one will cost me 1000 baht and it’s not a warranty job because the number plate is too heavy for the bracket, but he thinks it can be welded and reinforced. So off we go to the other side of the city to find the recommended welder. We find him and he’s like yes I can do but you have to leave the bike here overnight. My friend (kung fu) offers to dink me on her scooter, but I’ve seen her drive through the city and she is bat shit crazy and has a death wish so I politely refuse and arrange for it to be sorted in the morning. The next day I get up early and make my way to the welding man. Yesterday he was adamant that the bike should be there by 0800hrs. I arrive 0745hrs, the place is like a ghost town, and so I wait, 0800hrs comes and goes and it’s 0845hrs before my main man turns up. Seems it’s Thailand time all over again., It almost reminds me of my military days of hurry up and wait saga. But it was a lovely day and in all fairness after a tardy start to the day he did an amazing job and it only cost me 800 baht ($35AUD), in Australia I doubt that job would have been done with change from a couple of hundred, so therein lies a positive.

Being welcomed into a family for a Birthday party, was a highlight of the week. Authentic Experiences like this really, enhance your travel and cultural experience. Thanks Kung fu

Now I know I’m moaning a bit. but you get the drift, life in Thailand is not all instagramable moments whilst living an amazing life dream.
Ok now for the positive in the week. My friend (Kung fu) invited Tom and I to her family Birthday party. Now that was an absolute blast. It seems the Farangs were the guest of honour and even the 86 year old mother welcomed us with open arms. The communication barrier just served to make the evening a laugh, we tried our shit Thai, and they tried their English (they all learn at school) and once they were comfortable enough the conversation and beer flowed freely. There’s something simple and truly worthwhile about sharing a beer, eating slabs of dead pig cooked on the BBQ, dipped in spicy sauces and trying strange home cooked meals in a relaxed family environment. The laughs were infectious and the company great, it was one of those memorable moments in travel where you are simply accepted unconditionally, it’s not orchestrated or even touristy.  We loved it. Mind you after the party Tom and I made our way to Zoe’s in Yellow for more beers and the next day the hurt was there but rewarding none the less.  I really do think the key to any successful travel adventure is to get off the beaten path and away from the Farang (tourists). If you avoid them like the plague, you’ll find yourself in places and situations that are immensely rewarding and that potentially in my humble opinion compounds the experience and who knows you might just get that Instagramable moment. 

Chaing Mai Flower festival offers some good Picture opportunities but was way too touristy for this neanderthal. Still I rate it as worth a look

Until next week my friends, keep living the dream and pushing the comfort zones